Factors affecting the coming out process – intersectionality (Reading)

Coming out isn’t simply a matter of finding self-acceptance — it’s a choice that’s often wrapped up in issues surrounding one’s race, age, career, and community, and one’s ability to deal with the potential consequences (mental health, supporting relationships, etc).

1) Age

The experiences of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and gender-variant individuals may differ substantially based on their age. The time in which one has lived and/or came out can profoundly shape their journey: claiming certain identity labels, disclosing and expressing identities, parenting, and political involvement.

• Youth

LGBTQI+ youth often face problems in their school due to their sexual orientation, gender identity and/or gender expression, such as social alienation and bullying because of prejudices of their peers, teachers, parents and the wider society. These factors increase the risk of substance abuse or have long term consequences such as posttraumatic stress. The social stigma associated with LGBTQI+ may create pressure on youth to conform to heterosexual dating behaviors, to hide their sexual orientation – practices that can lead to “passing”, or to avoid social interactions. Attempts to mask or deny their sexual identity may put them at higher risk for unwanted pregnancy, engaging in unsafe sex, general health risk behaviors, interpersonal violence, mental health risks and suicide attempts.

LGBTQI+ youth often experience negative parental reactions to their sexual orientation and gender identity expressions. Supportive family may be a protective factor against the effects of minority stress for LGBTQI+ youth, however, well-intentioned heterosexual parents may not offer the insight needed to protect their LGBTQI+ children from heterosexism and cisgenderism, and the internalization of heterosexist beliefs within traditional patriarchal societies. Close relationships with supportive friends can serve as a buffer against the pain of familial rejection and/or societal heterosexism, thus strong friendship network is pivotal in sexual identity exploration and development.

3)     Elderly

For people who grew up during the 20^th century during which human rights of LGBTI+ people were out of professional, political and institutional sight, coming out may have seemed to be dangerous, especially in less accepting areas. Only a minimum number of trans persons had undergone a transitioning process before 2000. Older LGBTQI+ persons are often reluctant to come out because of these past traumas. Some of them were forcefully included in sexual orientation change practices (so-called conversion or reparative therapy).

Mental health professionals and services tend to not take into account the sexuality and gender experiences of older adults, rather they are considered to be asexual. Sexuality and gender continues to be an important part of one’s identity, sense of self and relationships well into their older ages. For example, many social service providers  think that sexuality does not matter to the eldelry, that it is a private matter everybody should keep for themselves, or that only young people identify themselves as LGBTQI+, thus this minority simply can not be found among older adults (Novotná, 2016).

In addition to simply being invisible, LGBTQI+ older people often face social isolation, as most of them do not have children, and unfortunately the idolisation of youth and beauty is present among LGBTQI+  persons too. The mental health professional needs to carefully address special challenges of LGBTQI+ elderly: lack of social support, lack of family members, poverty, economic difficulties, elevated shame, trauma, depression, loneliness and  isolation.

4) Religion

Many clients come from religious surroundings in which LGBTQI+ identities, transition or gender affirmation are considered to be a sin. While therapists should absolutely work to help clients embrace their sexual orientation, gender identity and/or gender expression, to overcome internalized homophobia/transphobia, it’s also important to consider that some families may never come to that same acceptance. Sometimes religious LGBTQI+ persons find acceptance in progressive religious settings, but other times the person decides to stay in the closet or chooses an alternative lifestyle of which sexuality and gender expression are less important.

5) Trauma

Psychological trauma from childhood or adolescence of LGBTQI+ persons (physical abuse, emotional violence, sexual abuse, e.g.) damages the whole aspect of human functioning: trauma is often the result of an overwhelming amount of stress that exceeds one’s ability to cope or integrate emotions involved with that experience. Trauma may result from a single experience or recurring events that can be precipitated in weeks, years, or even decades as the person struggles to cope with the immediate circumstances, eventually leading to serious, long-term negative consequences. Thus, it is very important to bear in mind how trauma can impact the decision to come out or not.

6) Intersections

–        Cultural, ethnic, racial and political background

Different communities view homosexuality and non-traditional gender identities differently — in some, it is a “quirk.”, in others, there is a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. Elsewhere, it is a sin and is to be punished (even with a death sentence) by the law. Therapists should consider where their client comes from — will coming out result in exclusion from their community, or threaten their physical safety?

Intersectional identities of the client must be also considered. It is a very different experience to be out for various racial/ethnic groups. For example, decisions about coming out may pose even greater difficulties for LGBTI+ youth of color for whom family and community may be a vital source of support for dealing with racism (for example LGBTI+ youth in Roma community). It is also highly important to consider cultural diversities in the contemporary fast-changing societal background due to migrations. For transgender persons there is high risk of discrimination in crossing borders if their bodies do not match sex assigned at birth in their documents. Sometimes they are denied health protection, hormonal therapy or are criminalized.

–        Physical, sensory and cognitive-emotional disabilities

LGBTQI+ persons with disabilities encounter a wide range of challenges related to social stigma associated with disability and sexual orientation, gender identity/expression. They experience the sense of invisibility due to prevailing societal views of people with disabilities as non-sexual and alone. One’s self-concept may be negatively affected by these, which further compromises their sense of autonomy, personal agency, sexuality and self-confidence. They may experience the pressure to be “normal” at least in their sexualities and genders, thus may try to adhere to societal ideals and expextations about gender. For example men are expected to be strong and independent, which qualities can be difficult to live up to for a person living with disabilities; and women are expected to be weak and adaptable, which feminine qualities are hard to avoid for disabled LGBTQI+ persons.